The Relaxation Technique That Eases Stress in Seconds

Posted: February 26, 2010 by thesundowner in Uncategorized

Imagine yourself stuck in a boring meeting at work, a long line at the bank, a long line waiting for gas at the filling station (that’s what we used to call them in Texas, years ago). Or… imagine yourself in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the Beltway in D.C. at 5:00 o’clock afternoon traffic.

Your blood pressure is rising… your stress is getting ready to shoot through the roof… you feel a tightness in your chest just reading this. Argh!

Before you “stress out” and have a heart attack in the middle of the freeway, stop and think.

No… I don’t mean stop in the middle of the freeway! Doh! Somebody behind you might “cream” you in the rear end and then you’ll REALLY be stressed.

No… rather stop thinking about the stressful situation you’re in. If you have a few seconds while you’re at a dead stop (What? You don’t like that analogy?) reach up and gently grab your ear lobes between your thumb and forefinger, gently massage them while closing your eyes and imagine yourself sitting on the beach down in the Caribbean, sipping on a Piña Colada, and then chant… “Whoosah! Whoosah!”

Make the syllables long and drawn out. “Whoooooooooooo – sssssaaaaah!”

Gently hissing the “s” in “whoosah” while exhaling.

It’s almost hypnotic. It’s kinky to some, and sounds a little stupid and “new ‘agey'” but hey! So is picking your nose in traffic!

Remember the movie “Bad Boys?” Remember the way they relieved stress? Try it. It just might work.

And if it doesn’t? So what! At least someone (maybe even you) will get a laugh out of it. And laughter is another good way to relieve stress.

Just think about the neighborhood bully. Now imagine yourself walking up to his and handing him an ‘ass-whuppin’ on a silver platter.

Now, wasn’t that funny? Well, okay… maybe not. But if the bully walked away massaging his ear lobes chanting “whoosah”… well now, THAT would be funny! And if you don’t think that there’s funny, then you just need to get up out of your seat and leave the auditorium right now!

  1. Turtlemom says:

    I’ll stay in the auditorium, thanks! And I do think it’s LOL funny, but not ROTFLOL funny!

    I used to keep a volume of dirty limericks in the car and I’d recite some of them, and memorize a few more at stoplights.

    Hey! I’m a dirty old woman! What can I say??

    • thesundowner says:

      Well, okay. Maybe it WASN’T that phunny. I read it to my auntie over the phone and she fell of her chair, though…

      So, what’s the acronym for falling off your chair funny? FOTCF

      Doesn’t make any sense.

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